Dear Blank, Please Blank

My friend introduced me to a new addiction. This website is hilarious and I often find myself going there whenever I'm avoiding doing homework....
Anyway, these are some of my favorite ones and I think some of you people out there will appreciate them
:)

Dear men,

Let's make a deal. We won't expect you to be 6'3", 250 lb body builders if you don't expect us to be size 0 Victoria's Secret models.

Sincerely, women

Dear government officials,

Thank you for spending incredible amounts of time and money shutting down Limewire and arresting all those who downloaded. Those music thieves are much more dangerous than murderers, rapists, and robbers.

Sincerely, I'm sleeping much better now.

Dear environmental science teacher,

You do know all that homework is killing trees right?

Sincerely, how dare you

Dear bra size,

Wanna trade?

Sincerely, bad grades.

Dear university teachers,

I don't call you "Professor" out of respect. I do it because it makes me feel like I'm in Harry Potter.

Sincerely, university student.

Dear boys,

Please keep dumping Taylor Swift.

Sincerely, I enjoy her bitter break-up songs

Dear PC,

Sorry you suck. There's an app(le) for that.

Sincerely, Mac

Dear God,

All I want for 2011 is a big fat bank account and a slim body...

Sincerely, please don't mix these up like last year

Dear chopsticks,

Please stop being so hard to use.

Sincerely, no wonder Asians are so skinny.

Dear Sleeping Beauty,

We should have warned you that one little prick could ruin everything.

Sincerely, women everywhere

Dear (: ,

You're doing it wrong.

Sincerely, :)

ear Shakespeare,

Poetic talent is easy to fake when thy sentence doth no freaking sense make.

Sincerely, unconvinced English student.

Well, anyway, I think all these are funny...maybe some you will join me in my new addiction, yeah?
peace.
Elizabeth
PS. the website is dearblankpleaseblank.com